Unless I'm forgetting someone else, Jennifer Connelly in Labyrinth was my very first celebrity crush. Her unmitigated disgust for whiny, blubbering infants stole my heart (sigh!!!!)
Much like Winona Ryder in Lucas, I was too young to actually fantasize about putting it in her. Instead I imagined how awesome it would be if she were my cool babysitter that would play Nintendo with me and let me feel her boobs. I vaguely remember a sleepover scenario where I'd take off her shirt and bra under the covers and go to town until my tiny wrists got sore from all that "turning the doorknob" action.
Through dangers untold, and hardships unnumbered, my testicles have finally descended. Jenny, Tonight Hoggle and I invade your Goblin Kingdom, tits are so 1986.
(Hoggle = my penis)
i didn't take it out for air
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